Some thoughts before bed

I know it's very early in the morning, and just as I was about to lay down to sleep, two things happened. First, my friend accidentally called me. :) That was funny! The second was I started thinking about how I wanted to write down something earlier, but I couldn't remember what, and suddenly I remembered.

Like a flood, seriously, here it all is, rushing out of me as fast as I can type it.

Well, first, this whole continuously introspectiveness (I know that's probably not a word) has me rethinking everything I do, including my global footprint, how to make sure Dray and I buy a house that will allow us to go off the grid sooner rather than later, living more green and less wasteful each and everyday, and figuring out how to rally my apartment complex into recycling...

Any-hoo, this all centered on my hair these past few weeks. My hair is something that I have always loved. I loved my hair, I think, as soon as I knew what it was...I was told I had thick, somewhat unruly hair (until my gramma or mama would wet a brush and get some blue grease (some of you know what I'm talking about) and then my waves would show). I always took pride in that. And it was thick, wavy and past my shoulders when I was younger, especially after Mama would press it out. I loved my hair.

Then, relaxers entered the picture. As much as it was easier for my mom to do my hair, my hair was never as healthy, or as well taken care of, until she started taking me to the salon regularly.
Then, when I would get my hair done every other week or so, it would be wonderful. I think it was quite healthy under professional care, and I enjoyed the relaxers.

Skip to the present day, when, in this economy and our financial situation, getting a relaxer as often as I would like, as well as regular hair maintenance by a professional, which is the best way to do things, is just not fiscally responsible for me.

I know it may sound cliche', but having Sean changed the way I think about every single dollar I spend. Long gone are my "young, single, and free" days. Now I'm young, married, and Mommy. I've changed so much from that chick that used to spend her money on what she wanted when she wanted - travel, clothes, food, drink, gifts, whatever. I almost don't remember her. Even the chick that moved to Maryland and became a responsible teacher, even she lived life a little differently, had a much fuller social calendar, and, well, spent her money how she wanted.

Hair care is something that is so far down on my priority list that it doesn't even make the list, wherever that is. But, the thing is, since I've started on this journey to better health and taking better care of Nakeisha, and learning to be a better me all around, hair care has popped up.

Let's face it, everyone wants to put the best face forward for any and all impressions. I don't want to walk into my future classrooms looking like a bum. And, frankly, just letting my hair grow and not doing anything but ocassionally washing it is not going to cut it for me. I want it to be healthy - a reflection of the me on the inside manifesting itself on the outside.

So, these past few weeks, I've been researching on natural hair care. It's something I'm extremely interested in simply because I can do my hair myself, it won't cost anything like getting regular relaxers, and my hair can get healthy with no or few chemicals. I don't have to worry about breakage due to not having my hair retouched in two or three months. (Currently, I have a patch of very short hair at my crown, mostly because of that reason, partly because of stress)

Anyway, I really wanted to put this out there, hoping some of my friends will read this and let me know what they think about this. I really, truly need some help in this department. I would love to get my hair straightened, but not chemically, and not necessarily permanently, should I ever want to have that "wash'n'go wet" look.

So, what are your thoughts, friends? Hope to hear from you soon.

Happy Feelings

So, today is a good day. I'm really busy, if you will, doing a whole lot of nothing, but I plan on getting my last assignment finished for class on Monday.

Honestly, it's a great day. Nice outside, Sean is running around, Dray's amusing himself watching videos...Ha! And I'm typing on the computer. I'll probably start writing in a little bit, but before I got into one of my favorite stories (I think this will be a great book), I thought I would get on and say hey. It truly has been a while since I've been on, and I feel bad that I haven't written anything in a while, nothing uplifting or inspiration, or, well, anything at all. I've been in a yucky place emotionally and mentally.

We've still got lots going on, trust me - Dray and I are still challenging each other with the Biggest Loser challenge, I'm in school and LOVING every minute of it, for the most part ;) and I'm writing, playing with Sean, and enjoy my last week or so of freedom before the school year begins again.

It is truly a blessing to have such wonderful people and things in my life. I love my husband, son, cats, and...new addition to the area, my lil bro!

Anthony has officially joined life on the east coast and starts law school at Washington and Lee in a week, I think. I'm so excited and happy for him! Plus, he's close enough to hang out for holidays! Whoo-hoo!

Plus, I found out one of my favorite cousins is still living in Virginia! Margie, I'm soooo coming to visit...and I know you'll love Sean! (And, as a disclaimer, all of my cousins, with the exception of some very distant ones, are my favorites...I love them all! I have a great family!)

Okay, that's all for now. Get out and do something today. Enjoy your life before you realize that it's passed you by.

Peace.

My apologies

So I've been gone for far too long...it's been over a month since I actually typed a word on this blog. I'm so sorry. I've been really struggling with the fact that I want to write, I need to write every single day...so, I'm going to do that, in earnest, and actually start writing more and more each day, including "flashbacks" if you will, to former blog posts. I love to write, really and truly, and I need to act like a writer, not a person who's walking around feeling sorry for herself.

Okay, so that's that. End of. I'll see you again soon. Promise.

Love, love, love!!!!

This just sucks

Right now, I'm feeling absolutely sorry for myself. I'll get over myself in a couple of days, I'm sure. I don't feel well, compounded by the fact that my husband will be working non stop on our anniversary this Saturday, and I have nothing to look forward to in the way of a vacation or a break until Christmas. I'm so tired, and I need a friend. I just wanna cry.

And the thing is, I don't necessarily want to talk about it, because I don't want to sound like I'm whining or that I can't take a little adversity.

I'm just tired, and I need a break. I need a big one. Some relief, and a huge bag of money (preferably filled with hundred dollar bills).

Well, that's all I've got right now. I guess I'll go cry in a corner now.

Peace.

Totally Disconnected

So, I've been realizing that in the course of my blogging, most of my blogs have been about what's going on in my relationships. I suppose that's normal, especially when, right now, all I want to do is find something funny or witty to say and I can't. I really can't.

I'm feeling a lot like an alien. Like I'm not from here, nor do I belong here. When I say here, I'm referring to Maryland, and the life here in general.

I've been here for almost four years now, and even I cannot believe it. Within these four years, I have made only two or three friends that I truly love and know are truly my friends. One of them moved away to Florida, so that leaves me with what - one or two?

I want to reach out more and actually have tried some, not a lot, to reach out to others, but I don't really see anyone reaching back out to me.

I know that I'm a mommy, and my son comes first (and with me, almost everywhere I go...believe me, I'm really over it, and would LOVE to have a baby sitter on call...). And, I'm happily married, so I enjoy being with my husband.

However, that doesn't mean that I don't need or want girlfriends in my life.

In fact, when I see other people I try to get to know or at least see on a regular basis enjoying each other's company and having a good time, I feel excluded and alone, like being all by myself in a crowd of people.

It's not that anyone has done anything to make me feel this way, it's that it is the way I feel.

I've said it time and again, I'm so tired of being alone. Really. I know I'm not alone because God is always there, but, as I've said to Him on many occasions, it's nice to have a physical flesh and blood person to hold on to.

I guess I'll keep looking....

I've been neglectful.

My apologies to all, and here's what's going on right now. So, I'm a little bit overwhelmed because my classes started, and I mean full force - I've got two (2) three credit hour classes which meet three times a week - one class on Tuesdays and Thursdays and the other class meets on Wednesdays.

I'm finishing up the last weeks of school with my students, and I'm going to be missing them because I will not be returning to that school in the fall...as far as I can see, anyway...

And, I'm getting frustrated over our Biggest Loser challenge because people were so gung-ho in the beginning, and now, five weeks into the process, I'm barely getting weigh-ins from folks. So far, my brother from another mother, Jerry, is WHOOPING our butts - he's lost over four percent of his body weight thus far. That's a big deal.

Anyway, I'm going to see how my progress is going, as promised, and post my measurements yet again. So, here's what they used to be - the last time I gave them to you, of course.

Chest - 52.25"
Waist - 56.5"
Hips - 56.5"
Arm (Left) - 15.75"
Arm (Right) - 16"
Thigh (Left) - 27"
Thigh (Right) - 27.5"

Now, here's the new ones:

Chest - 50.25"
Waist - 55"
Hips - 52"
Arm (Left) - 16"
Arm (Right) - 16.25"
Thigh (Left) - 26.625"
Thigh (Right) - 27"

Holy moly, ladies and gentlemen!!!! I'm calculating a total loss of 8.375 inches!!!! Oh My Gosh!!!

Well, I'm doing something really right...and I'm gonna keep going. Ain't no stoppin' me now!!!!

Keep watching and reading...I promise to amaze you!

Still....

I guess it's safe to say that I'm still dealing with the loss of my uncle. I'm so glad he is no longer in pain and is awaiting the calling of his name by God, on that great "gettin' up morning" as the old folks like to say (especially in the country). :)

I just wanted to post a blog for the sake of posting and letting everybody out there know I'm okay, and so is my family. Thanks for all the love and support.

I want to write sooo much, but I can't get my fingers and brain in alignment for some reason tonight. I've got to go make sure my son hasn't torn down the entire living room area where he keeps his toys - really, where I make him put his toys. :)

Good night, and hopefully I'll have something funny or humorous to write about soon...I sure hope I do...sheesh!