Today there is supposed to be a huge Atheism Rally in DC. I've been praying about this because I'm concerned about the message being sent.
One of the things that many know and believe is great about this country is that we are all free to believe (or not believe) as we see fit. There are as many different faiths and beliefs here as there are possibly in the entire world.
I think that it is wonderful for everyone to have this freedom.
There is only one thing, though, that I truly believe many are wrong about. I truly believe, and I know that Jesus is more than just a man who lived thousands of years ago.
He is the Son of God. He is the Messiah. He is Lord of Lords and King of Kings.
I guess this Atheism Rally today really bothers me because many who are atheists tend to bash Christianity (the most) and any other faith that believes in the existence of God.
I do not understand this.
While I am an individual, one thing that I will always do is respect the beliefs and rights of others. So many people feel and have experienced hatred and hurt from people who call themselves Christians.
For this I am very very sorry. I don't know what I could do to change anyone's mind about a painful experience they have had.
BUT...there is ONE thing I can do.
The one thing I can do is LOVE you. And him. And her. And them.
And I can pray for you. And continue to pray, even if you talk about me and belittle my beliefs. I would not do that to you. Because that is NOT the way God and His son Jesus raised me, as a daughter (by the saving grace of Jesus).
Bless you all.
Peace.
Saturday, March 24, 2012
Sunday, March 18, 2012
Rejection
...well, it really hurts to be rejected. Especially when you've never been rejected in a particular area of your life before.
I will give you a very good example.
I'm used to getting asked out by the men I am attracted to, or even those that I'm not necessarily attracted to. Yes, I need to lose weight, yes, I may not be every man's "cup of tea", but I can still pull 'em. ;)
So....if a man that I'm attracted to (and who admits he is also attracted to me) rejects me, I am taken aback. What?! How did that happen?
My feelings get hurt. I may go cry in my closet (or in a corner) about it. I may spend a few days in a funky mood, trying to figure out why this guy doesn't want me. What did I do wrong? So on and so forth.
Well....
Do you know what I'm learning?
It's more about my reaction to the rejection than the actual rejection itself. I can choose to wallow in self-pity, become self-righteous, or proceed to talk bad about the person who has rejected me.
OR....
I can learn from my rejection AND (most importantly) move on.
Rejection is supposed to be a learning tool. I feel that either you learn this was not for you, or maybe you need to work on some things. And not just to be "more attractive" or something like that. Maybe there is some personal issue you have that you have not yet resolved.
The whole idea is that this closed door is either so that a better opportunity can come along for you or so that you can continue your training or development to become a better you. Why be sad and sit and throw a "pity party" for no reason?
So...your story got rejected.
So...your boyfriend/girlfriend is done with you.
So...you didn't get the job offer.
We could go on and on and create a massive and quite extensive list of these same scenarios and situations. But, guess what? It doesn't change the fact that it's time for you to learn from this, GROW, and move on.
Let's move on together. Find out something new about yourself and make improvements.
That's what I'm going to do.
Peace.
I will give you a very good example.
I'm used to getting asked out by the men I am attracted to, or even those that I'm not necessarily attracted to. Yes, I need to lose weight, yes, I may not be every man's "cup of tea", but I can still pull 'em. ;)
So....if a man that I'm attracted to (and who admits he is also attracted to me) rejects me, I am taken aback. What?! How did that happen?
My feelings get hurt. I may go cry in my closet (or in a corner) about it. I may spend a few days in a funky mood, trying to figure out why this guy doesn't want me. What did I do wrong? So on and so forth.
Well....
Do you know what I'm learning?
It's more about my reaction to the rejection than the actual rejection itself. I can choose to wallow in self-pity, become self-righteous, or proceed to talk bad about the person who has rejected me.
OR....
I can learn from my rejection AND (most importantly) move on.
Rejection is supposed to be a learning tool. I feel that either you learn this was not for you, or maybe you need to work on some things. And not just to be "more attractive" or something like that. Maybe there is some personal issue you have that you have not yet resolved.
The whole idea is that this closed door is either so that a better opportunity can come along for you or so that you can continue your training or development to become a better you. Why be sad and sit and throw a "pity party" for no reason?
So...your story got rejected.
So...your boyfriend/girlfriend is done with you.
So...you didn't get the job offer.
We could go on and on and create a massive and quite extensive list of these same scenarios and situations. But, guess what? It doesn't change the fact that it's time for you to learn from this, GROW, and move on.
Let's move on together. Find out something new about yourself and make improvements.
That's what I'm going to do.
Peace.
Saturday, February 18, 2012
Ranting, raving, and more...
I am in love with my husband. Pretty sure I've made that clear over the years on this blog.
What I haven't ever really disclosed is that I am also in love with another person who is not my husband.
My feelings for this person have grown over the years, and what makes me sad about it is not in a way of comparison; I have just found genuine reasons for enjoying being around this person.
Of course, I felt terribly guilty about lying and saying that we were just "friends".
Maybe to him we are; but to me it's so much more than that.
So, I did what any good wife would do - I decided to cut off communication with him.
The problem is, I think about him everyday. I can go for a while without thinking about him, but then something will happen or someone will do something or I'll hear something that reminds me of him.
I would feel like an evil adulterous woman if I ever betrayed my husband and hurt him in any manner - so I keep this to myself for the most part. (I'm sharing with you guys, right?)
The biggest problem is I just want to be free of the love. I will always love him.
Just like I will always love my friends that are no longer my friends. Just like I pray for them (I pray for him, too, but almost daily).
I guess the biggest question is - do you believe that you can truly be in love with more than one person?
I know that I do, because I am experiencing the difficulty of living with a love for a man that I cannot see or be with for the rest of my life, while at the same time, desiring and wanting an amazing life with the amazing man I married.
How is it that the people with the biggest hearts end up with the most bruises? Is it because we constantly put ourselves out there? Is it because we love everybody and want good for them?
I don't know. I feel like there is a reason that I'm going through this.
What's worse now is there are two things going on.
1. I'm worried about him. I still consider him to be a friend and he's going through something right now. I want to be there for him; he won't return texts or any other attempts to communicate with him. I guess he's really done with me.
2. I feel completely rejected by him. I sent him a letter to which he did not respond. I suppose I must appear to be a crazy woman. I actually made the mistake of opening up and showing him so much of myself - I shouldn't have done that. I'm an extremely intense lover and in general, I love HARD. Most people are not prepared for that. I truly think I freaked him out.
I know I'm a very different individual. I tread lightly most of the time to keep others from knowing how deep my feelings are and how far I will go and what I will do. I work to keep my temper and my passion in check; I know it is a bit much for many people. And I like having friends and family, right?
...this is so painful. I hurt all over.
Yes, there is a lot I am not saying here, and no, I will not say it. The point is, I guess this is a lesson to me for letting my guard down and letting the wrong one in.
Not to say that he was "wrong"; he very well could have been a great match for me; our chemistry is off the charts, truly, and, did I mention that I love him? :)
I just have to make sure I'm using my spirit of discernment to keep from inflicting unnecessary pain on myself. I really am lonely sometimes.
It's hard to believe that you can feel alone even within a crowd, but I am a walking testimony to that very statement.
Well, I've done enough, I suppose. I just want the hurt to go away, or at least to lessen so I can pretend I don't miss him and don't think about him a little better each day.
Peace.
NSWR
What I haven't ever really disclosed is that I am also in love with another person who is not my husband.
My feelings for this person have grown over the years, and what makes me sad about it is not in a way of comparison; I have just found genuine reasons for enjoying being around this person.
Of course, I felt terribly guilty about lying and saying that we were just "friends".
Maybe to him we are; but to me it's so much more than that.
So, I did what any good wife would do - I decided to cut off communication with him.
The problem is, I think about him everyday. I can go for a while without thinking about him, but then something will happen or someone will do something or I'll hear something that reminds me of him.
I would feel like an evil adulterous woman if I ever betrayed my husband and hurt him in any manner - so I keep this to myself for the most part. (I'm sharing with you guys, right?)
The biggest problem is I just want to be free of the love. I will always love him.
Just like I will always love my friends that are no longer my friends. Just like I pray for them (I pray for him, too, but almost daily).
I guess the biggest question is - do you believe that you can truly be in love with more than one person?
I know that I do, because I am experiencing the difficulty of living with a love for a man that I cannot see or be with for the rest of my life, while at the same time, desiring and wanting an amazing life with the amazing man I married.
How is it that the people with the biggest hearts end up with the most bruises? Is it because we constantly put ourselves out there? Is it because we love everybody and want good for them?
I don't know. I feel like there is a reason that I'm going through this.
What's worse now is there are two things going on.
1. I'm worried about him. I still consider him to be a friend and he's going through something right now. I want to be there for him; he won't return texts or any other attempts to communicate with him. I guess he's really done with me.
2. I feel completely rejected by him. I sent him a letter to which he did not respond. I suppose I must appear to be a crazy woman. I actually made the mistake of opening up and showing him so much of myself - I shouldn't have done that. I'm an extremely intense lover and in general, I love HARD. Most people are not prepared for that. I truly think I freaked him out.
I know I'm a very different individual. I tread lightly most of the time to keep others from knowing how deep my feelings are and how far I will go and what I will do. I work to keep my temper and my passion in check; I know it is a bit much for many people. And I like having friends and family, right?
...this is so painful. I hurt all over.
Yes, there is a lot I am not saying here, and no, I will not say it. The point is, I guess this is a lesson to me for letting my guard down and letting the wrong one in.
Not to say that he was "wrong"; he very well could have been a great match for me; our chemistry is off the charts, truly, and, did I mention that I love him? :)
I just have to make sure I'm using my spirit of discernment to keep from inflicting unnecessary pain on myself. I really am lonely sometimes.
It's hard to believe that you can feel alone even within a crowd, but I am a walking testimony to that very statement.
Well, I've done enough, I suppose. I just want the hurt to go away, or at least to lessen so I can pretend I don't miss him and don't think about him a little better each day.
Peace.
NSWR
Monday, February 6, 2012
Monday, January 23, 2012
Sunday, October 23, 2011
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