Sorry....

It's been a really long time since I've posted, mostly because we've given up our cable and decided to use our phones for checking email and things like that. This means, of course, that the blogging has suffered greatly.

It is my humblest apology that I am offering here in this post, and I will ask for patience as I continue to work on being a more regular blogger.

Thank you so much, and have a wonderful weekend. I've got some planning and work to do for this weekend...Monday is the first day of school! I'm looking forward to making a great first impression with my students!!!

Yay for Geometry and Precalculus!!!

Peace.

It's late...

so I'll be brief. This Independence Day weekend has been great. I enjoyed every single moment of it.

I am so proud to be an American. I'm so proud of my family that serves our country in the military - and currently my cousin Candy is over in Afghanistan. I am praying for her safe return home.

Having said all of that, I hope that we all can continue to live free, and that includes all of the differences and idiosyncrasies we all have. No matter what you believe, if you are a citizen of the United States of America, you are a friend/brother/fellow American.

God bless you, and God bless the United States of America.

Peace.

My son turned three....

on this past Thursday. The first day of July, my sweet baby boy (not such a baby, really) turned three.

Every year, when his birthday rolls around, I am reminded of the precious gift we were given the day he was born. It could have been that he died that day. In fact, he should have died. He should not be here.

He failed the Asvgar (sp) test that they give to babies immediately from the womb both of the times they gave it to him. He was white, no color, his lips were blue, and he made no sound. God bless him, he sure did try, though.

And the nurses and doctors were worried that he wouldn't make it. They weren't trying to upset me, but I could tell something wasn't right because I didn't hear his baby cry. I never did.

One thing I am more sure of than anything else, is that there is a God. This God, the one, the only true God, is the one who gave me my son.

As he was whisked away to the NICU, attached to every tube they could connect to his little body, Sean displayed a very dominant trait of his personality - his persistence.

Sean pulled those tubes off his face and let out the biggest yell he could, to let us know he was here. He's still loud. I expect nothing less.

With tears in my eyes, all I can do is give thanks for him every chance I get, and for the opportunity to be the mother of this miraculous child.

Of all the many blessings I've received, he is definitely the greatest. I'm so grateful. So thankful.

Happy Birthday, Seanie. May you have many more and may you be the blessing to this world that God intends you to be.

Peace.

What a day

So, today we had quite the day. They were working on some plumbing issue in the apartment, so we had no water. Dray and I decided to stay out all day, and we took Sean to school, and proceeded to spend what we thought would be a nice day, just the two of us.

Boy were we wrong.

I'm so glad Dray's mind works the way it does. He called to find out if the guy he shares the working responsibilities for a client with was back from Africa. He went to visit his family (or was it to go to the world cup?).

Well, it turns out that he missed his flight. Really? I'm very suspicious about that. How is it that you miss your flight back to America when you have to cross Africa (continent #1) then Europe (continent #2) to get back to the United States (located on continent #3 in this question)?!

Hmmmmm.....

So, Dray is working with this client, according to the mother, for at least today (Monday), and tomorrow. I predict Dray will be working the week, because I cannot imagine that it is easy to get a flight out of Africa right now, due to all the incoming and outgoing traffic from the World Cup (I know it's in South Africa, and this guy is from Ghana, but, still....come on, now). Also, he's got to realign his connecting flights from Africa to Europe to the United States. I don't think that will be an easy task. Not because it's unheard of - international flights go on daily and hourly - but because of the logistics. That's three continents you have to get access to, and three different places you have to work out of three different time zones in order to get back to your job.

Sheesh. I think he just wanted to stay a little bit longer. He could have just told us all that up front. I was really looking forward to a relaxing week of planning Sean's birthday party and whatnot with Dray before my class starts up next week.

Oh well....we'll see if he can get back to the states before Thursday. I highly doubt it...that seems like at least a three day turnaround, and he was supposed to leave yesterday and only notified someone today. Come on, now.

Okay, that's all for now. It's late, and we've just gotten home. The good news is the water is back on. :)

No bad news to discuss. Isn't that nice?

Take care.

Peace.

Writing and what not

So, I have to stop perpetrating and acting like this is supposed to be the blog of all blogs. In actuality, I'm quite ashamed of myself.

Me, the one who can't stop journaling, has not done so for the past year. I'm almost positive that the reason is because of school, work, husband, and baby. I haven't had the time to sit down and write out my thoughts and feelings about a lot of things.

So, since that's where I'm at today, I'll start with something that is old, and end with something new.

Here's the old (out with the old). My former singing group has reunited for a show that will be at our former church, since this show (the annual youth talent show) is the one that started us out as a group. We did it for a laugh, and it became something serious.

Apparently, all the girls will be in attendance except for me.

Now, I'm feeling some kind of way about that, but the truth of the matter is, I'm so happy right where I am, I have no desire to go there.

Seeing the three of them together again could possibly put me back at 18 again. And considering that I'm well past that, I want to move on from it.

Part of me wants to go just to see what will happen and to finally close up the chapter of "all of us" for once and for all.

Another part of me wants to sit in the audience and laugh - mostly because I'm the only one still singing out of the entire group.

And finally, the better part of me wants me to be happy and let it all go.

So, after pondering it all, I've decided to be happy for their reunion and I wish them all the best.

It should be great fun for a night. And, since I won't be there, it can't be a true reunion....lol!

But, it's a reunion all the same....they're already practicing....it's not until August, but that's about right. We have to do it right, you know, and I don't expect anything less than a great show from them. :)

Now, for the new...

I've been going back and forth about what to do with this blog. I'm thinking that I'm going to start writing up some of my short stories and putting them on here. Whatever comes to my mind to write about.

It will give my blog more of a purpose, and, of course, it will keep me in the practice of writing.

I do plan on becoming a well known author (Bestseller's lists, baby, at least every two years) in the near future, so I really need to start honing my craft.

I'm also planning on taking up the guitar (for real this time) this summer. I miss my music in my life everyday like it was before...so I've got to get back to it. I love it too much to just sit on my voice. Besides, use it or lose it is a real thing.

Okay, that's all I've got for now. Keep looking for more updates...

I promise to be more devoted and to get on here at least once a week.

It's my blog and it deserves at least that much love.

:)

Peace.

My Head Hurts

It really, really does. So, I'll just come back and write later. I really haven't blogged in a really long time, and I honestly thought I would get back into it, but the truth is, my school work, working at a school, and being a mother, wife, sister, daughter, and friend is kicking my a$$.

Anyway, life still presses on, and hopefully this headache will subside long enough for me to enjoy this evening with my husband and son. I really love being with them, and I realize how blessed I am to have this family.

Especially when I think that four years ago, almost five, I didn't have the prospect of a husband, nor was I going to get married. In fact, somewhere in my head, I had settled on being an amazing aunt and teacher, my students being all the children I needed or wanted.

I'm so glad that God, who knows the desires of our hearts better than we do, wouldn't allow me to get comfortable in that frame of mind. He knew that I gave up a career because I wanted a family - in fact, He pushed me into teaching. :)

So, here I am, celebrating my life, and loving every single minute of it - the crazy, not so fun, mean, nasty, and ugly minutes, too.

Thank God for Sean and Dray. My two men. I wouldn't have it any other way.

Peace.

Politics and bull-ish

So....I'm probably happier than most about being off of work for the Spring Break season this year. I am totally overworked. Underpaid doesn't even get to be the word I use because, I'm not even getting paid - I do the work of a teacher, grading, teaching, creating lessons and all of that, but no paycheck. AND I'm in school. AND I'm probably doing more than I should be doing by definition of what my internship is (in writing, anyway)...What kind of foolishness?!

I'm sure you're wondering if I understood what I was getting myself into. I certainly did think I knew, but to be honest, this has been the hardest six, seven months or so that I have had in a very long while.

I guess it's nice to know that those cliche's and sayings are true - hard work really does pay off. My cooperating/supervising teacher for this semester basically told me he was happy with the job I did teaching. And, that's super important to me, simply because, frankly, he is allowing me to take over his classes. I hope I'm doing a great job. I know I really want to do a great job.

I'm really happy to do it. I love teaching...

But the hustle isn't over yet...after the 16th of April, it's back to subbing, and I'll need to meet my 90 day obligation to the county, so I'll be trying to work every single day...EVERY single day...let's hope for the best, and pray about the rest!

Have a great one, friends!

Peace.

Wow...

So, I was watching Ruby today...I missed the season premier! But that's okay, I saw the episode today, and I got all emotional watching it.

I can totally identify with her about those missing memories and just wondering why...I also understand the denial, and knowing what is fueling my issues with weight.

I'm so emotional because I am so fortunate to have an amazing small group and we are starting a new book on forgiveness, and I realize that most of that forgiveness really starts at the root of everything.

I need to forgive some very close relatives and some not so close, in order to really start processing some things...

I won't be going into detail much in this entry; I don't know if this is the time, but I do know that I am thankful for the opportunity of a new day and the chance to do something amazing in it.

It's my job, now, to do that, to work, to live, to love to the fullest.

I am so tired of that "kind of"/"sort of" life. I want the biggest, boldest, most beautiful (I know "beautifulest" is not a word...lol) life I can possibly live.

It is time.

I hope that you can find that same truth in your own life, and begin to let things go so that you can move on. :)

Love and blessings.

Oh, the weather outside is frightful...

And the family is soooo delightful! LOL!

I'm actually enjoying this time...and to be honest, at first, I was very, very upset. I was thinking...oh, great, I'm gonna be stuck in this awful apartment for who knows how many days, and all I'll be able to do is eat and sleep...(insert expletive here)!

But, truth be told, I got a real calming in my spirit very late last night. I realized that this opportunity was given to me by God to get myself in order...to get some things accomplished that I had been putting off, simple mundane tasks, like cleaning my room and organizing things...catching up on some reading, and also to reconnect with my husband a little bit.

This is a great time of reflection, and of really seeking and listening to God. Honestly, what else do I have to do? It is a blessing to have this time to do what I need to do, and prepare myself for the tests and challenges to come.

I have no reason to complain...I am blessed with heat and energy, when others around me have lost power for days. I have plenty of food to eat, and great company to share it with. :)

I have movies to watch, games to play, books to read, and journals to write in...and this blog of course. ;)

With that being said, I also have projects to complete, rooms to organize, and the time thanks to God, to do it all in.

So, my friends, if you've been complaining about the weather, perhaps this is a time for you to look inside yourself; maybe there is an incomplete task or project you now have time to complete. Maybe there is a person you need to talk to on the phone or in person, if you are fortunate enough to be able to get around. Maybe this is the time to write down that epic "To Do List" that we all talk about. Maybe it's just a time to sit still and...be.

Whatever you choose to do with this time, know that the time is all yours to use...do your best to use it wisely.

Bless you all, and may you all be safe, warm, and happy.

Peace.

It will all be worth it

This afternoon, on my way home from work, I was listening to Mary Mary in my CD player. The song they were singing was entitled "It will all be worth it". This song basically talks about how those of us who believe in Jesus will have that peace, that eternal life that is worth living right on this earth for.

Tears began to fall, and fog up my glasses. My thoughts immediately turned to my uncles - My Uncle Charles, who we said goodbye to in early May, and my Uncle Ural, whom I barely knew, who we said goodbye to shortly after Thanksgiving last year.

My thoughts went to my cousins, all of them, and their parents, and the loss they have to endure until that day.

Until that day when "it will all be worth it".

One of the lines of the chorus, the best line, I think says, "Though you can't see it now....one day, I know you will."

Nikki, Angie, Treecy, Nieka, Man, Carlos, Bruce, Aunt Mary....it will all be worth it.

We will see them again. We will.

And, though you can't see it now...one day, I know you will.

I love you all so much.