and you still take my breath away. I still fight every urge to call you, to the point I make myself physically ill so I won't call you. But I still call you. I have no willpower when it comes to you. One word, one glance, one breath from you and I would come running, abandoning my entire life for you. I would leave it all if you said, "Come." One single syllable would bring me to my knees and my entire world crashing down around me. I am crazy for you. I am desperate for you. My heart skips a beat at the mention of your name. I can't eat or sleep. I toss and turn, trying to make myself stop thinking about you. You consume most of my waking thoughts and all of my sleeping ones. Your touch, your scent, your voice...the feel of your hand on my cheek...I feel lost without my thoughts of you and yet, if I had you, I don't know if you would want me. You are my personal enigma, the challenge I cannot conquer. The puzzle I cannot solve.
You make me crazy. You make me sane. You would complete me if you would take a chance.
You will never know how deep my love is or how long it would run. My heart is yours to break or to heal and to cherish. But I know you won't.
You never will.
And so, I will pretend to ignore the lump in my throat at the thought of your name. I will pretend I can't sleep because of work. I will blame my unhappiness on my new life changes that happened suddenly and without my doing.
I can act like a Hollywood Star.
Only you and I will know the truth.
I just want....you.
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